Why adults have extramarital affairs?
Speak about a loaded theme that no one wants to speak about, that’s it. Amusing thing, extramarital affairs have been going on since old ages. Extramarital affairs can be loaded with troubles, cause heartache, and other problems. In addition you should wrap your brain around all the other issues, there’s that truth and sincerety issue, finances, age difference, spiritual education, shame, and on and on. I expect there will be some strong opinions about some of this.
For the purpose of this post I shall define an affair as a long term, maybe weeks long relationship of a sexual nature between two individuals of whom one or both are married to other persons, lonely wife looks for dating.
Why do married people have extramarital affairs? There are as many answers as there are women seeking affairs. I think generally though it is only the human state, the need for love, belonging, to be wanted and cared for, the caring for others and wanting to be loved and loved. Here are a several explanations I have run across.
Naturally we as humans are all sexual beings. Nature has us set up to reproduce, to have sex. Sex is pleasing and fun, and sex makes us flee the real world for a brief period of time. This excitement exists for whatever amount of time we are able to keep the adrenalin levels high enough. Somebody are able to turn the longing on and off, some are excellent at controlling it and others are so-so at best. Though we all have it, young and old, able bodied and not so able. It is the Human condition. For some of us it is the sex act itself that drives us. For some of us it is the excitement of the hunt. For some of us it is the seduction, for some it is the love for another person, for some it is the wish to be appreciatedloved, for some it is the whole romance thing. These wishes and yearnings can be so strong they overcome the taboos culture has erected against married dating. For many people the yearnings will defeat their fears and make them risk the rage of not only their relatives, but society also. So why, what is the method?
Sex Addicts, possibly some of us are. Sex is awfully pleasant, better then drugs, a natural high. If you are in this group of biologically driven sex addicts and can find away to have sex and not injure your spouse or anyone else? You will need to reduce the threat you are taking. If you have the attitude that a good affair is one that is advantageous to all, then good luck.
No love at home, or no romance. I suppose this is the major group, colossal in fact. There are many couples whose marital relationships is over, but they feel comfy in the manner they exist, and upsetting the extended families is not on their list of things they wish to do. You love your other half but there is no romance. Then there are the children to consider. Your assets are so knotted. You need the medical insurance, and so on. There are a lot of reasons to stay together besides love and sex.
Bodily reasons, there are some people who can not have sex. They have physical circumstances that stop them implementing the sex performance, at least not with their spouse. An extramarital affair at times solves the trouble while keeping the marriage uharmed.
Avoidance, sadly this is a frequent cause I fear. One or the other, frequently the guy is sexually neglecting his woman for a tones of reasons. As a man I actually am thankful to you guys neglecting your ladies and making them available to us guys of romance, making them “milf wives” Though I still think it is despicable that you are neglectful. Also there is the spouse who is neglectful until the wife or husband has an affair, then they condemn them for doing so, when they where the catalyst. Those who neglect, then condemn, are not just neglectful, but malevolent.
Something is just omitted in the marriage, I can not put my finger on it, but its not there. Probably its romance that is missing, could be it is a shortage of love, could be compassion is vanished, could be it is the closeness, could be neglect. Could be we have simply grown separately, our ordinary interests diverged. Maybe it is that what I want, and what I want to do the rest of my life, is opposed to of what you want. Could be I just do not know what I want from the marriage anymore. Maybe, just maybe I miss that sensation that when I am with you, it just feels right.
The ultimate reason people give is, they search for the passion that is missing and so very much longed for.
There are other reasons, the feeling of power, to run off, for financial gain, for retribution and so on. I am sure there are more reasons why people have affairs then these. I only stop because if this gets too long no one will read it.